Your touch
by Shazza
Summary: Ok a nice little bit of fluff foryou . Rated R for future chapters.
1. Default Chapter

Chapter one  
  
The Christmas holidays are my favourite time of year. I become like a little child again. I revel in everything that I can. That year was no different I was just ludicrously happy. Isn't that a great phrase "ludicrously Happy." It was a few days after Christmas when everything began.  
  
I was lying in the Common room half asleep sprawled across the couch reading while watching the shadows flicker against the walls of the common room. I was reading Daniel Deronda By George Elliot- one of my favourite muggle books. I can loose myself completely in it.  
  
Harry had gone away to Sirius's house for the holidays, Ron and I had been invited but decided to let Him and Harry just enjoy being together for the first time. I wasn't too upset that Harry wasn't here because it gave me some time with Ron without ending up talking Quidittch.  
  
The Other big plus was being the only ones left at school in Gryffindor house. We had spent are days doing whatever we felt like going wherever we chose and our evenings just reading in the common room or playing chess or snap. I was so happy but it was like something was missing.  
  
I could look at Ron and just feel so complete and serene. We hardly ever fought anymore he had grown up from a little boy into a mature and funny kind man. Shame about me-I was still Hermione the little book worm. Serious and dull. Whatever I felt for Ron I was sure he didn't feel it back he would only like me as a friend. Ron had so many girlfriends a different one each week. My feeble attempts to date had just been embarrassing and painful. I would never be able to like anyone as much as I liked him.  
  
That was why I found myself lying asleep on the couch at one in the morning waiting for him to come home after a particularly long detention with Snape. Ron had spent so many hours at quidditch practise over the years his body had become toned and strong. He wasn't a small bloke and couldn't walk lightly so as soon as he walked through the portrait hole I awoke from my slumber with a start and jerked up startled.  
  
"woah slow down mione" Ron grinned at me. He looked tired and worn form all the ridiculous jobs Snape had made him do.  
  
"You shouldn't have waited up" Ron gently chastised me coming to sit down next to me .  
  
"I was no problem" I murmured "I'm not tired" I let out an enormous yawn.  
  
"For a very clever witch you say some very silly things" Ron teased me. He came to sit down next to me. I started to get up to give him some more room but he grinned and said, "You look way to comfy for me to disturb you" Didn't he want to sit next to me. What he did next surprised me greatly, he picked my shoulders up a little way off the couch and sat down then he rested my head on his knees.  
  
I was really uncomfortable why was Ron playing with me like this one minute we were all play the next it was strange he was taking the friendship thing a bit far. Not that It bothered me but I had to know it was real. I couldn't bare it if he was just playing around but it felt so nice.  
  
Ron was playing with my hair while going on about Snape. I felt something inside me build. I just started at his face while he ranted suddenly I felt this uncontrollable urge to kiss him and damn the consequences. All that I could think about was how it would feel to have his lips on mine.  
  
I sat up slowly and looked at him his lovely eyes before taking his face in my hands and kissing him. I will never forget that feeling. Everything was perfect for about five seconds before he pulled back.  
  
I sat there and realised what a fool I had made of myself. I felt sick I had just ruined everything and got up to run away. What a class act Hermione way to go I thought I shouldn't just get out before I start to cry and loose all dignity I had left. 


	2. Every time I'm near you it Hurts

Every time it hurts  
  
This is a little authors note: Thankyou to everyone who reviewed my story. I really appreciate it. You have no idea how much it means to little old me.  
  
  
  
Shelly K: you have to be one of my favourite authors on this site and your stories inspired me to try a few of my own. It is so cool to have you even review one of my stories, Thankyou so much.  
  
I am going to write this from Hermiones point of view k. if you don't like this please say!  
  
Oh lord I just looked at him for a moment. It took only a second before I realised I had made some huge mistake.  
  
" Oh Ron I'm so sorry it was an accident " I mumbled if I had got any redder I think I would have burned.  
  
I felt like crying. Why would he think that way of me?  
  
I wasn't funny or pretty or anything like the normal airheads Ron went for.  
  
And still Ron just stared at me like I head grown an extra head or something. Like he had never even met me before. Well what did I expect, him to like me the same way I liked him. To return all my pent up feelings. Well it was obvious he didn't.  
  
I got up and started to leave when Ron grabbed me by the shoulder. Not hard not softly but firmly.  
  
" Let me go Ron " I argued tearfully " If you don't like me its ok you just don't need to rub it in " I mumbled.  
  
" Like you?" Ron almost gasped at me in surprise  
  
" Well you didn't kiss me back " it sounded so stupid at the time , like I was some hormone ridden love starved teenager.  
  
" Sit down Hermione " Ron forcefully pulled me down this time.  
  
In shock I fell over and twisted on my ankle.  
  
This was all too much. I had just really hurt my ankle, I was tired humiliated and felt so stupid. I let out a sort of half strangled cry and collapsed on to the floor very ungracefully. I started to cry, I don't often cry.  
  
" Oh shit Hermione have I hurt you? " Ron asked concerned  
  
  
  
I just continued wailing. I felt Ron put his arms around me for the second time in one night. I made me want to just die.  
  
It felt so good but Ron had made it very clear that I wasn't what he wanted.  
  
After I had started to pull myself together Ron asked, " Can I have a look at that ankle then "  
  
His voice was calm and so controlled. Whenever he spoke it made things at least a little better.  
  
  
  
He propped me up against the chair and shuffled down to my ankle.  
  
He pulled my robe up my leg perhaps just a little more than necessary. Well at least I thought so.  
  
He put his hands round my ankle and started to feel it. It was driving me insane. What did he think he was playing at? It felt like white fire passed through, my whole body was on fire.  
  
My ankle didn't even seem to hurt anymore. He got out his wand and flicked it a few times. My ankle was well bandaged and strapped up.  
  
" Were on earth did you learn to do that?" I asked Ron through my tears.  
  
" When you live in a house with 5 brothers you learn a lot of practical things " he answered wryly.  
  
He sat beside me and hugged me against him again.  
  
" I'm so sorry Ron " I muttered  
  
" What have you got to be sorry for " he asked surprise.  
  
" It was my entire fault, I know you don't like me like that and I made a move on you and it wasn't fair. "  
  
I stared at him my mouth was wide open and he seemed to think he had upset me again.  
  
  
  
" But I do like you "I gasped " I like you like you so much It hurts you pulled away when I tried to kiss you back. "  
  
" But I thought you only meant it in a friendly type way you never said anything" said Ron aghast  
  
" Neither did you " I pointed out. My eyes were wide and all I wanted was to kiss him again.  
  
Ron decided that the time for talking was over.  
  
He pulled me against him as softly as he could.  
  
And kissed me.  
  
It was so nice being kissed like that. Like I was the only person that would ever matter this much to him.  
  
I wrapped my hands around him holding him tight against me. His hands ran through my tangled hair.  
  
He made it feel like silk.  
  
It was a long slow passionate kiss.  
  
So pure just starting out together nervous almost chaste but so perfect.  
  
He kissed my neck as I ran my fingers through his fiery red hair. It was so nice. Sometimes things just go click and its perfect. You just know it will work.  
  
He pulled me softly up on to his knee and planted butterfly kisses all round my ears.  
  
Ron was more experienced than I was but it didn't matter.  
  
Things were going to fast I decided when Ron started kissing down past my shoulders. The rational part of me said time to stop Herm. He's only after one thing the other part begged for him to continue.  
  
As always I listened to the sensible part. I flapped at his hands, which had started to unbutton my robe.  
  
" Not tonight " I mumbled  
  
" Oh sorry " Ron drew back as though I might explode at him .  
  
I just drew him close to me. He helped me up to the couch , my ankle although no longer hurting couldn't take my wait.  
  
I lay half beside half on Ron that night his hand splayed out on my tummy. It was nice. He played with my hair and whispered little things that made me giggle.  
  
He never pushed it. He just kissed me again and said he would wait forever.  
  
I don't know how comfortable it was for him but it was perfect for me. 


	3. In the sky with diamonds

In the sky with diamonds  
  
  
  
The next morning was so nice, I didn't come back down to earth at all when I woke up.  
  
It was so cool being the only ones in the whole school in Gryffindor.  
  
  
  
I woke up to Ron tracing little circles on by back with his fingers. It was the nicest way to wake up.  
  
Next to Ron.  
  
  
  
I looked up sleepily to find us in the same position we had fallen asleep in all arms and legs and hair and Elbows.  
  
" Hey oh sorry for crushing you " I murmured sleepily  
  
" You didn't " Ron whispered in my ear " and even if you did I kinda liked it,"  
  
I jumped up in mock anger  
  
" How dare you Ron Alistair Weasly " I pouted. " No more lying next to me or kisses for you from now on. " I ordered.  
  
" I don't know if I like the sound " of that Ron growled, With that he grabbed me and pulled me into one of his long soft kisses. I tried to resist at first but when you're kissed like that its so hard not to kiss back.  
  
"No more I've got to have a shower " I said firmly.  
  
" That's easy I need one too " Ron replied I saw his face and he was only half joking.  
  
" Promises promises " I sang as I leapt off the couch and up to the girls' dormitories.  
  
I knew it would be hard to put Ron off for long but I needed to be sure that it was true.  
  
Not just his Hormones going out of control. Or maybe I was more afraid that it was me and my hormones that I couldn't control.  
  
Showers are good places for forgetting about bad thoughts and that's just what I did.  
  
Now came to the hard part, what to wear. I know I didn't need to impress Ron but I wanted to look nice for our first day together.  
  
Finally I decided on a pair of my favourite hipster jeans and blue cashmere top.  
  
I pulled my hair into a plait and decided against make up, just a bit of Vaseline to keep my lips soft.  
  
Wonder why I thought innocently at the time.  
  
When I walked down Ron was already dressed and pacing around the room.  
  
" You'll give yourself a nose bleed getting all stressed up like that I " I joked.  
  
" Oh I thought you'd never come down. Ron said this so sincerely it made me want to kiss him again.  
  
" So where are we off to?" I asked Ron draping an arm around his  
  
" What " gaped Ron confused?  
  
" Our first date of course " I giggled  
  
" You have to ask me out before you can say that we are going out " I joked  
  
Ron latched on and answered " of course Well Hermione, you see it's like this, theirs this girl I really like, and I think she likes me back. "  
  
" What's she like " I said joining in the game.  
  
" Well she's not very pretty or nice or funny in actual fact I don't see why I like her at all!"  
  
" Cheek " I exclaimed, " I don't she wants to go out with someone who thinks she's not funny or pretty or anything. "  
  
" Ill just have to make her then " Ron trilled  
  
He grabbed me by the waist and kissed me and whispered in that low gruff voice " she's gorgeous " he whispered it right in my ear. " she's funny and intelligent the only girl for me in fact "  
  
I giggled I Hermione Granger giggled like a pathetic bimbo.  
  
" Well I think that the guy I like isn't so bad himself " I loved it then just Ron and I flirting openly with each other.  
  
" Well I thought we could go to Hogsmead " Ron said  
  
" That would be great " I answered enthusiastically  
  
" Grab your cloak then " I ran up to the dormitory and wrapped my cloak round my neck. I glanced outside it had snowed badly that night.  
  
Back in the common room we set off towards Hogsmead. When I think back on it I wish I hadn't gone. But wishing wont change anything and it would have happened somewhere else.  
  
Ok this chapter is more of a link to other chapters. Thankyou so much to everyone who reviewed it means a lot to me. Do you think I should carry on this story or work on my other one? 


	4. When fire burns

When Fire Burns  
  
  
  
Hogsmead looked like something out of a muggle postcard. The whole Town was swept in a layer of thick snow. Ron held my arm when we walked, it felt no different to any other trip we had made except I felt this amazing happiness that seemed to soar right through my veins. Ironical now I think back.  
  
I suppose it would be a good point to tell you about the situation with the dark side at the moment. Harry defeated Voldemort last year. Things were in no way back to normal yet but they were getting there.  
  
  
  
Attacks weren't uncommon in those days but they were growing less frequent. It was like the wake after the funeral was over and things were getting back to some kind of normality but you still remember the death.  
  
When I walked down the little lane that was called the high street I didn't care. I know that sounds so cruel and maybe it was but I didn't care.  
  
it was like the thick mist I had been fighting through had finally cleared and I was just laughing in the winter sun.  
  
Well we walked and talked about God knows what but it didn't even matter.  
  
" Do you want to get a butter beer for me and you at the three broom sticks?" Ron asked loosening his grip on my arm.  
  
" Yeah if you want don't be long though " I answered not put out but inquisitively.  
  
  
  
" Ok, " Ron kissed me quickly on the street and walked away. I thought nothing of anything and set off to walk in the pub down the road. I gathered my cloak closely around me. It was turning cold and dark.  
  
Even though I was Witch I still felt nervous, my mother always said, " Never go wondering by yourself when its dark Hermione even if you think its light the darkness creeps around you "  
  
A voice suddenly took me by surprise. " Hermione " it called. I would know that voice anywhere, It was Harry.  
  
"Were are you?" I shouted back not caring if I sounded foolish.  
  
" Turn around " Harry answered  
  
And I did. I can still remember that turn like I was watching it outside of my eyes.  
  
I turned and white-hot flames engulfed my whole body. I screamed in pain my whole body writhing in absolute agony.  
  
People started to scream and shout spells but nothing helped.  
  
The last thing I can remember is a dark figure smiling at me while Ron ran up the street.  
  
Fairy lights shone above me, they were all twinkly. Someone was holding my hand it was nice then before I realised the pain. Things came slowly into focus Ron was next to me that was nice. I tried to smile and realised I couldn't. With that disturbing thought I drifted back into the world of dreamers.  
  
  
  
Ron 's pov if people don't like this tell me but I think it works  
  
Fate has such twisted mind. I mean I only left Hermione for a few minuets didn't I and it's my fault she's the way she is now. I left her to buy a book that I had spotted in a wizard's bookshop.  
  
I don't know how it had ended up there I mean its not often you find a signed charlotte Bronte classic outside of a museum. I knew it would be perfect for Hermione.  
  
It didn't even cost that much I doubt if the owner even knew what they were selling.  
  
  
  
I bought the book and walked back to find her. Down the street there was this huge commotion and something was on fire.  
  
I ran, I have never run so first in my life, I knew the second I saw the flames that it was her. No one was doing anything. I ran forward and smothered her human instinct I suppose.  
  
I put out the flames but it was to late, the damage was done. Who had done this what had she done to hurt them. I screamed for help but the witches and wizards just stood there as though we were cursed. I soon realised the dark mark had appeared over us and as I cradled my poor Darling in my arms . 


	5. Scars

Scars  
  
  
  
Ok I'm guna write this chapter from Miones point of view  
  
  
  
" Ron " I mumbled the pain in my head stabbing lucidly this time. What I heard though was more of an incoherent mutter than anything else .  
  
" Its ok I'm here " Ron answered  
  
" What's wrong with me " I tried to say but couldn't I guess that from the sound of my groans Ron understood me.  
  
" You've been burned very badly " Ron whispered his voice sounded so choked. He reached out for my hand held it to his lips.  
  
I started to slip out of consciousness again I understand now it was the drugs that made me so sleepy.  
  
The next day I carried on like this in and out of sleep not really conscious of anything except Ron and that my face felt as though it had been slashed to pieces.  
  
It was about the third day after the fire that I awoke properly.  
  
" Ron " I managed. I had repeated that word every time I had woken up in the past few days and he had always answered.  
  
  
  
I managed to turn my head slightly even though shooting pain ripped through it. He was asleep he hadn't been shaving in the past few days and his hair was dishevelled. Apart from that he looked fine. I was so relieved to see him.  
  
As though he was attached to me by some sort of string he woke up with a start.  
  
When he saw me looking at him he smiled. He lent over and kissed me. It was so gentle his lip barley made contact with my skin it was more like a soft breath than anything else.  
  
  
  
" What's wrong with me" I murmured  
  
" Do you remember the fire Hermione"  
  
" Yes" vague recollections rushed through my mind. White flames Ron dark person, everything was jumbled together.  
  
" Well you were burnt very badly Hermione" Ron spoke so sorrowfully that It worried me I had no idea of the damage.  
  
" Let me see I" I croaked  
  
" No" Ron shook his head determined  
  
" Let me see " I repeated. I was no fool and now that my wits were fast coming about me I felt panicked.  
  
" No" Ron replied his voice even firmer than before.  
  
"Yes" I shrieked as loudly as I could. This large movement in my mouth made me shake convulsively with pain.  
  
I tried to lift my arms but found that they were tucked so firmly under the bed covers that it made movement impossible.  
  
I started to cry and try and lift my body up. Ron all through this grew increasingly alarmed. I  
  
  
  
In the end he got up beside the bed and loosened the covers away from me. He took my hands in his pulled me against him. I struggled at first as the horrific burning came back to me. I knew what I would look like.  
  
After a few hours sleep in Ron's arms I came to. My first thought was a mirror and how I could get one.  
  
The pain in my face had lessened and I thought that if I tried I might be able to walk. Ron lay next to me exhausted.  
  
I got shakily to my feet. My head was in a whirl. I walked across the hospital wing slowly like a baby. My white robe hung loosely off me. My eyes stung by the white light. I realised that the light had been dimmed in my cubicle. I found a full-length mirror against one of the large walls and looked at myself.  
  
  
  
My face and neck had been bandaged well. I took the end of one of the bandages and unwound it slowly.  
  
Half my face was disfigured. One half exactly as it was, the other scared and raw.  
  
There were scars all over criss crossing the left side of my cheek. My hair was badly burnt and in places I looked bald.  
  
I was hideous I reminded myself of a Barbie doll I had as a plaything when I was younger.  
  
A boy at nursery had burnt her hair and scribbled all over part of her face with red felt tip pen.  
  
I felt light-headed. It was as though the monster before me was just a picture not real. With that last painful thought I fell to the floor. 


	6. souless

First of all I apologise., Sorry, sorry, sorry, sorry . I have been very sick for the past year and things have been very hard. I am very upset that I have not been able to post this chapter any sooner. Most people must have thought I had given up on this fic but no on it goes. Please enjoy this little chapter regular updates will follow -I promise. This chapter is for everybody who has ever reviewed this story sorry it's so sad. I also need a Beta reader anybody who will be patient with me is very welcome!  
  
  
  
  
  
And still the fire burns  
  
  
  
I am ugly, I am disgusting, I am a freak, I should be locked away so no one has to see me like this. And still they wont let me have a mirror however much I plead. And still Ron stays and I still I cant talk properly and still I want to die from shame and hatred, I am rotten to the very core with disgust of myself.  
  
Ron found me lying on the floor in the hospital wing. I had fainted with weakness and horror of the monster I saw In front of me. He carried me back to bed and lay down next to me.  
  
While I wept into him. I hope he will leave me. I hope that I can be forgotten rather then have peoples pitying looks I cant stand pity and it's so cliché.  
  
I mean Hermione Granger so clever such promise thwarted so young by a tragic event leaving her maimed for life. They expect me to carry on and be strong but I cant be, I don't want to be and I feel like just leaving humanity behind and not seeing another face again.  
  
The voice I heard wasn't Harry's It was a death eaters trick he killed himself before the ministry found him. Their last attempt to inflict evil on the world before they all go to Azkaban.  
  
Ron wont leave me alone. I want to scream every time I look a his perfect face. He is so handsome. I am so deformed. My lovely hair has started to grow back but it still looks horribly thin in parts but it will grow unlike my poor face.  
  
Harry tries to be strong for mw but I can see him trying not to look at me straight on. I repulse even my best friends.  
  
The worst thing is that there is no cure I will always look like this for life. Half of me covered in scars and the other half as normal as ever. Only my eyes are the same.  
  
As the burns were inflicted by a magical source there is no known cure that Madame Pomfrey can find. Half of me will remain timeless and ugly the other a reminder of what I might have looked like.  
  
  
  
I cant move my mouth well enough to talk properly. So I have to gesture and write things down. Not that theirs a lot for me to say.  
  
I refuse all visitors except Harry who I cant get rid of and Ron who hasn't left me except to shower and sleep at Madame Pomfreies insistence.  
  
I hate Made Pomfreis forced smile every time she looks at me. It's the smile of a nurse who can look at even the most terrible accident and smile her Nurses smile and say everything's going to be ok. Well it isn't.  
  
I am a freak I am deformed I was never beautiful but I was not the monster I have become. I refuse to take dreamless sleep potion, in sleep I can dream of a time before I lost half my soul. 


	7. Waking up

Waking up  
  
I have never felt so alone. My mother wanted to come and see me and take me home to rest and convalesce. They think I am going mad or loosing it. I don't know maybe I am. I haven't looked at my face since the accident.  
  
I know what I look like but it's not just my face, down one side of my leg I have a huge ugly scar.  
  
I sent Ron out. I screamed until he left me alone. In the end Madame Pomfrey thought I was getting too over excited and begged them to leave. Ron looked so desperate as he left, he was dragged out by Harry shouting that he wanted to stay. I will never let him stay.  
  
I behaved like a spoilt child. I know I did. It was Ginny who managed to set my mind right again. That girl should truly be a nurse. I was lying in bed when I heard a bad tempered shout. You can always hear Ginny's shouts they boom and shriek.  
  
"I will see her" she screamed, " If it kills me because if I don't it will kill her" She burst into my room and stood at the end of my bed. I ignored her. I felt like crying again. Here was Ginny looking at me I couldn't work out what she was thinking and I didn't really care.  
  
" I think it's time for you to get up" Ginny said very quietly. Then turning to Madame Pomfrey she asked in the same worryingly polite voice.  
  
" Is there any reason why Hermione should not get up now?"  
  
"No not at all but not for long as she will be very weak." Madame Pomfrey stuttered in amazement.  
  
"Right then Hermione You and I are going to take a turn around the garden." Ginny commanded.  
  
It wasn't a question. More of a direct order. I was stunned. No one had dared asked me to do anything since the accident let alone order me. However rude and hard Ginny sounded it was exactly what I needed.  
  
"Stand up" said Ginny. And I did. It was as though my brain had fogged over and Ginny's voice was going straight to my limbs.  
  
I stood up and nearly fell over.  
  
Ginny conjured up a stick and gave it to me. "Time to get dressed I think" muttered Ginny. "Madame Pomfrey would you please leave us for a while," Madame Pomfrey left quickly shutting the curtains behind her. Ginny conjured up a wash basin and started to wash me. I let her, I didn't have to strength not to. After she was satisfied that I was clean she muttered a spell and a pile of freshly laundered landed in her arms.  
  
Ginny dressed me. She was so unself conscious. I was ashamed but even though I wept and wailed for Ginny to stop I couldn't move. When she was done she brushed my hair and tied it up in a blue ribbon.  
  
I felt a spark inside me I began to feel almost human again. Then I remembered. People would see my face. My ugly face.  
  
Ginny seeing my look of pure terror stopped for a moment and said. "Would like to wear a scarf just at first."  
  
I was so relieved I nodded and said my first proper words to her, "Yes thankyou" She got a long blue scarf and put it over my head. And wrapped it very gently around my face once and then slung the other half over my shoulder.  
  
"There now you look lovely" Ginny smiled at me. I hugged her. I felt awash with gratitude for her. After fixing my cloak around me and making sure I was bundled up as warm as toast we left the hospital wing.  
  
As we walked out of the hospital wing I saw a lump lying on a bench covered in a blanket.  
  
Ginny left my side for a moment and shook the lump. I realised that It was Ron. After me throwing him out of the hospital wing he had slept outside the entire time. 


End file.
